

If the images in this chapter are broken, read it at gruglysims.ca instead!
In which there are sixty-nine pics but no sixty-nine.
There's a bigfoot dick hangin' out all over the place, though.
So there's that.


Beatriz: Hey buddy, wanna hang out?

Sullivan: REPETITION IS HUMOROUS

Sullivan: Really drawin' those readers in!

Xavier: You know he only keeps your around because he thinks the readers like you, right? You might want to stop casting doubts on their existence.

Xavier: I am not very good at casting, myself.

Sullivan: Some fuckin' wizard you are.

Nick: I'm some fuckin' wizard.

Beatriz: Don't cross-contaminate my subjects!

Beatriz: Take this queue number.

Amin: I'm number two!
Emerson: You certainly look it.

Beatriz: That's not nice. I approve.

Mrs. Crumplebottom: I don't approve of anything.

Amin: I approve of teleportation!
Emerson: I approve of not having to walk places.

Penny: I approve of covert surveillance.

Penny: And also walking on Nick.

Amin: Don't mind me, I'm taking anthropological notes.

Emerson: Decide if this is a mating ritual or not!

Xavier: STOP WALKING A MILE IN MY SHOES

Amin: Give her a mile, she'll take the entire highway.

Beatriz: WITNESS!

Beatriz: Was that a reference to something?
Amin: I thought everything was.

Amin: Usually there's YouTube links attached, though.
I'm feeling lazy today.

Sullivan: Yeah, me too. You ever have one of those days where you know you could slaughter a small building full of people, and dogs, but you just don't wanna?

Amin: “and DOGS”?

Beatriz: Hot dogs!

Beatriz: Keep yours on this side of the buns, though, please.

Emerson: Your low-quality sex joke broke our sex.

Beatriz: Actually it was my disinterest that did that.
Emerson: Hey, that was probably my first time!
Beatriz: Probably?
That's my saving roll in case it turns out I'm wrong.

Amin: Save a roll for me, too.

Emerson: You should teach everyone to teleport!
Beatriz: I don't want to jam up the hyperspace lanes.

Emerson: That's fair, if that's a thing.

Beatriz: I am also fair.
Amin: And we are both things.

Beatriz: Combine our things.

Amin: I think your thing might be too small for my thing.

Beatriz: My thing is adaptable.

Amin: I just came.

Beatriz: Yeah, me too.

Amin: That was quick.
Beatriz: I think you mean “thick.”

Meanwhile, absolutely nothing.

I have seen the moment of my greatness flicker,
and I have seen the eternal Footman hold my coat, and snicker,

and in short, I was afraid.
- T.S. Eliot

Beatriz: Fear is the boner killer.

Amin Successful orgasm does the job better.

Beatriz: Yeah, but a little less CLEAAAAANLLLYYYY...!

Beatriz: I've never done it biggy-style before!

Amin: It's good exercise.

Anthony: Damn sasquatch!

Anthony: Can't fault his task in sasquitches, though!

Beatriz: That was the shortest, most intense fucking of my entire short, intense-fucking dominated life.

Amin: Yeah, you're welcome.

Beatriz: If this is what that gets me, I'd rather be unwelcome.

Hi, '13!
Grugly2013: How did you know I was here?
I left one useless pic with no moving lips in, just to trap you.

Beatriz: You want moving lips? I'll show you moving lips.

Amin: Such motion!

Amin: Surely there's some tongue involved in that, too.

Beatriz: g gnk gvm dy mnrmfng.

Beatriz: dt g frg dr grn dl dt rm mgrnyn mrgrf.

Beatriz: grnd dr?

Beatriz: dr drnd rf dr rztr.

Yusun: I bet she's saying something really important, to.

Probably something about how huge your mouth is.

Beatriz: This would be such a badass way to initiate sex.

Instead, she fucked the laws of physics.

Beatriz: They deserve to get fucked.

Kennedy: So, about how you're gonna teach us all to teleport.

Pictured: an unusually fine ass.
Emerson: Thanks!

Beatriz: You're all welcome.

Beatriz: To eat it.

Fly away home.
Beatriz: Yours or mine?
Next time: family sciences.
This chapter depicts gameplay from 5 May 2013.